Abstract: The Invention is a swimming machine operated by a hydraulic pump and hydraulic motor. A first and a second tubular rail support the swimming machine in a swimming pool and are configured to resemble a swimming pool ladder and thus disguise the swimming machine. The configuration of the tubular rails substantially prevents use of the swimming machine as a ladder. A radio-operated remote control proportional relief valve selectably bleeds hydraulic fluid from the high pressure side to the low pressure side of the hydraulic pump, allowing remote control of the velocity of water in the pool.