Abstract: Various embodiments of the present invention are directed to a disposable toilet shield. In one embodiment of the present invention, the disposable toilet shield includes a seat cover, a front tongue that attaches to the seat cover along a tongue-shaped perforation, and a rear tongue that attaches to the seat cover near a rear edge of the seat cover. The front tongue can be separated from the seat cover along the tongue-shaped perforation, and remains attached to the seat cover near a front edge of the seat cover. The seat cover shields a user from contacting a toilet seat, the front tongue shields a user from contacting the front of a toilet bowl, and the rear tongue dampens splashing of toilet water and reduces the amount of user waste left in the toilet bowl after the toilet is used and flushed.